LYRICS
Seymour Skinner:How do we gag a blabbermouth like Lisa?
Superintendent Chalmers:How do we crush her First Amendment rights?
Seymour Skinner:How do we stop her writing up what she saw?
Superintendent Chalmers:Would she shut her trap?
Seymour Skinner:For a gift card from the Gap?
Skinner and Chalmers:She might.
Teachers:Oh, how do we stop a royal pain like Lisa?
How do we make this righteous less uptight?
Lisa:You asked to see me?
Seymour Skinner:Lisa, would you consider tutoring Cletus's children?
Superintendent Chalmers:You'll be happy, they'll be happy, and I can go home and enjoy some delicious fondue.
Seymour Skinner:Made with...fondue set I bought you for Christmas?
Superintendent Chalmers:No. So what do you say, Lisa?
Lisa:Me? A tutor.
The hillbilly tykes
Will become my tutees.
Cletus:Hey, kids, the plow mule done burst a girl critter!
Kid:These colorful bumps is funny.
Lisa:And guess what? Ben and Ken the Street Magic Men are only the beginning.
The city is a treasure trove of culture and multiculture.
Mistos and lattes and grandes and ventis
Browsing at bookstores with fat cognoscenti.
Comic Book Guy:Books about Dali, Degas, and Miro,
Those are the folks that you yokels should know.
Lisa:Pretentious laughs at Bunuel retrospectives
Outsider art made by mental defectives.
Kid #1:Enjoying opry that ain't grand or ole.
Kid #2:Comparing Jim Carrey to Dario Fo!
Lisa:Your minds are opening! Take it home!
Man:Eating tapas
Boy:Freestyle rap-as.
Lisa:Mrs. Skinner is Mame.
Agnes Skinner:I'll charm the husk right off of your corn!
Lisa and Kids:We finally experienced cultural things
And now they don't seem
So lame!
Krusty:What a number! You kids got talent! And I should know, I used to have it.
Kid #1:I have eight teeth goin' on seven teeth.
Kid #2:I have a curvy spine.
Kid #1:We live on landfill...
Kid #2:And feast on roadkill...
Kid #1:While we all drink moonshine.