Be

作曲 : potsu

There's something rotten inside me

You told me to be better

Ain't honestly likely

You told me to be more

Truth is I cannot be

You told me to be smart, kept promising I'm free

You told me to be strong and belong

Alarmed me that, otherwise, my life won't be long and lively

Do something when I'm gone they don't despise me

You told me don't be wrong

Forgotten that I'm me?

Become something that I'm not

Crushed between the four walls, ceiling and the floor boards

I can't walk nor see forwards

When I talk my speech Mordor

Scrambled thoughts that need order

Not in reach, they're lost in deep waters

Drawing on sleep exhausts my zeal harder

Caught in grief I've honestly authored

I don't wanna swim no more, I want to fly

Looking up at those that do, but I don't identify

I feel lonely when I try

My dreams always seem to die

I keep falling

I'm so sorry, I'm appalling in your eyes

Show me how to be, I'll show you how to not

I will climb the tallest tree and tie the tightest knot

Yeah, hell yeah, I'm flawed as hell, I could never love myself

As long as I carry this guilt, I will never feel fulfilled

Show me how to be, I'll show you how to not

I will climb the tallest tree and tie the tightest knot

Yeah, hell yeah, I'm flawed as hell, I could never love myself

As long as I carry this guilt, I will never feel fulfilled

Beep, beep, beep, beep-beep, beep

Beat

I reach for the screen, I need sleep

This sequence is bleak

It reeks, then repeats week after week, increasing my fatigue

I feel weak

Tough to conceive I still bleed when I seem to be proceeding on reflex

Deceit that I could feel relief, that I could seek dreams

Which seemingly all my experiences deplete

See, at the beginning they said that I would be winning

What a beautiful thought

But one I no longer believe in

Belief feels belittling now, I've been beaten

Bested beast, depressed and defeated

So rest in peace to me that felt different

Guess I failed at living

Guess I fell and I guess I'm frail, so my failure isn't your fault

Just the weather shifted, and my feathers withered

Show me how to be, I'll show you how to not

I will climb the tallest tree and tie the tightest knot

Hell yeah, hell yeah, I'm flawed as hell, I could never love myself

As long as I carry this guilt, I will never feel fulfilled

Show me how to be, I'll show you how to not

I will climb the tallest tree and tie the tightest knot

Hell yeah, hell yeah, I'm flawed as hell, I could never love myself

As long as I carry this guilt, I will never feel fulfilled

One lonely night, coming home from work to heavy rain

Thirty feet from the train cross I cross every day

Bar halfway down

I don't hesitate

Close both my eyes

Oh, for heaven's sake, hit me today!

I just want it all to be erased

Disappear with the fear and despair

Dissipate

All I've ever done is been afraid

All I've ever done been is been this way

You claim I ain't broken

You liken my wounds to things that you deal with with ease

I should too

You make me hate me more than I should hate you

It's always you, you, you

But mama, I'm me

I just wanna be

And I hope you're okay with that