Exhausted

Honestly I’m exhausted.

Why is my society so toxic.

My sobriety affecting me like I was standing in a mosh pit.

I just think I’m running outta options.

Everyone the opposite.

Hoping they don’t see me as a college kid.

Cuz most of them don’t even know what knowledge is.

I’m ripping up my scholarships.

I just wanna be an artist now.

And I know they’ll prolly hate me, say I’m watered now.

I don’t got any trophies.

I’m stuck on the shelf.

Everyday is my battle.

I’m only fighting myself.

If I was ever deployed.

I think I’d write to myself.

They say they want me to fail.

I’m not receiving no help.

I’m not wanted, haunted by every comment.

I promise I'm being honest.

They just wanting the honor.

I was never the starter.

Breaking through all my armor.

Maybe I’m just a joke.

I Should’ve been working harder.

Tell me okay

It won’t stop the pain

Life continues this way

And I am drowning so

Call me lonely, call me messed up

Im just tired of this world and I’m tired of myself

Right now I don’t know about it.

Tryna think of anyway, that I can go about it.

Lotta thoughts in my mind, now it’s overcrowded.

Take a sec, and a breath to control the balance.

Every minute adding up, on the stopwatch.

Not enough time, feel like everybody bossed up.

I cannot shoot, time is up on the shot clock.

Wishing I could swish, but I’m still getting crossed up.

Say you balling out.

Friendship falling out.

Always in some trouble, no one hear when I’m calling out.

Hoping music gonna change my life.

People leaving me I know that I can make it right.