My Name Is (Slim Shady Radio Edit)

Hi! My name is (what?)

My name is (who?)

My name is Slim Shady

Hi! My name is (huh?)

My name is (what?)

My name is Slim Shady

Hi! My name is (what?)

My name is (who?)

My name is Slim Shady

Hi! My name is (huh?)

My name is (what?)

My name is Slim Shady

Ahem, excuse me

Can I have the attention of the class

For one second?

Hi kids! Do you like violence? (yeah yeah)

Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails

Through each one of my eyelids? (uh-huh)

Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (yeah yeah)

Try 'cid and get ****** up worse that my life is? (huh)

My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin' to get my head straight

But I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate (oh)

And Dr.Dre said, "Slim Shady you a base-head"

Uh -uh! "So why's your face red? Man you wasted"

Well since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else

'Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt

Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's ****** off

And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross

I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass

Faster than a fat ****** who sat down too fast

C'mere slut (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog)

I don't give a ******, God sent me to piss the world off

[Chorus]

My English teacher wanted to have flunk me in Junior High

Thanks a lot next semester I'll be thirty-five

I smacked him in his face with an eraser

Chased him with a stapler

And stapled his nuts to a stack of papers (ow)

Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up

Flashed the bartender, then stuck my ****** in the tip cup

Extraterrestrial, running over pedestrians

In a space ******p while they screamin' at me

"Let's just be friends"

Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to

I just found out my mom does more shit than I do (damn)

I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper

Make a record about doin' drugs and name it after her (oh thank you)

You know you blew up when the women rush your stands

And try to touch your hands like some screamin' Usher fans (ah)

This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph

(Dude, can I get your autograph?)

So I signed it,

"Dear Dave, thanks for the support, asshole!"

[Chorus ]

Stop the tape, this kid needs to be locked away (get him)

Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, operate!

I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die (****** that)

I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive

(Huh yup!) Am I comin' or goin'? I can barely decide

I just drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to drive? (go ahead)

All my life I was very deprived

I ain't had a woman in years, and my palms are too hairy to hide

(Whoops!) Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk

I spit when I talk, I'll ****** anything that walks (c'mere)

When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits

How you gonna breast feed me Mom? (wah)

You ain't got no ****** (wah)

I lay awake and strap myself in the bed

Put a bulletproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (bang)

I'm steamin' mad (argh)

And by the way when you see my dad? (yeah)

Tell him that I slit his throat, in this dream I had

[ Chorus]